Reichen Lehmkul Interview

The boyfriend, TV star, activist, and former military man adds author to his resume

By Bobby Hankinson

Reichen Lehmkuhl. He’s the boyfriend of former *NSYNC star Lance Bass, winner of the fourth “Amazing Race,” calendar pin-up, and absolute hunk. He’s got a hot body and a chiseled face ~ the kind that begs to be carved in marble. This dreamboat, however, is more than just a pretty face. When he’s not making the boys and girls drool, he’s making them think.

A former U.S. Air Force Captain and an outspoken activist in the gay community, Reichen has come out with all guns blazing against the military’s “Don’t ask, don’t tell” policy in his new book, Here’s What We’ll Say. But before the book, the media attention, and his heartthrob man-candy status, he was just a boy from Norton with dreams of flying. It wasn’t until he was 20 years old that a potentially explosive secret threatened to take it all away.

Some could argue that Reichen grew up with flight in his blood. His maternal grandmother was a WASP (Women’s Air Service Pilot) during World War I and from an early age Reichen wanted to take to the skies. He saw his chance to go airborne in the Air Force Academy, but getting in was no easy task. In addition to the standard drudgery of applications most students face when applying to school, prospective cadets also need to acquire a nomination from a congressional rep. Reichen secured his nod from Rep. Barney Frank and set off for the academy.

Reichen shares that he, like many others, didn’t realize he was gay before he entered the academy, but through the grueling training and intense experience, he was able to better understand himself.

“That’s why we have a lot of gay young people in the military, because they enter at such a young age ~ it’s the first time they leave home, it’s the first time they go and accomplish something as great as basic training where you’re kind of torn down and brought back to the person who you really are,” he said. “The strength that you gain from something like that gives you that maturity to actually admit to yourself, if not anyone else, that you are in fact gay.”

Upon coming to terms with his gender preference (he prefers the term to “sexual preference,” because he believes the choice is about more than just sex), Reichen had an additional factor to deal with ~ the government’s “Don’t ask, don’t tell” policy.

“Here I am coming out to myself at 20-years-old and saying, ‘Wow this is who I am and now I’ve got a secret,’” he said. “After going through everything I went through to get into the academy, there was nothing that was going to make me lose that.”

He confided in another cadet who ended up confessing he was also gay and soon, Reichen found himself in a sort of secret society of about 50 gay cadets. The stakes were high and they knew it. When they went out, they would plan what they would tell anyone who became suspicious. Each time, the planning always started the same: “Here’s what we’ll say…” It was a mantra that many of them had inscribed inside of their class rings to symbolize the dangerous double life they were forced to lead.

Reichen made it through the academy with his secret. He served his five year active duty service commitment and received an honorable discharge with the rank of Captain. But though he made it, it wasn’t always easy. In his book, he details a sexual assault he suffered at the hands of fellow cadets while at the academy and the anguish he felt at having to hide who he really is.

For now, Reichen is focusing on the future. While gay marriage remains a hot-button issue, he’s looking to draw attention to the “Don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. When he talks about it, he works himself into a furor, barely pausing between breathes. His passion pours out of him and, while sounding mild-mannered and humble over the phone while discussing his past, his famous boyfriend, and his family, he launches into sermon-like rants when the conversation turns to the policy.

“We integrated women into the military and instead of doing it like ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell,’ [telling women] ‘Oh you could come in, women, but you need to dress up like a man and don’t tell anyone that you’re a woman. And if anyone finds out you’re really a woman, we’re going to get rid of you,’ we brought women in, we set up counseling for women, just in case something went wrong and they needed help, like if they were assaulted ~ [just like] like gay people are assaulted in the military. We set up human relations training to explain to the people who didn’t want the women there why it’s OK, to explain, educate ~ we need to do that for gay people. And we put up a zero tolerance policy for any lack of understanding of that integration ~ we need to do that for gay people. “

Whether America is ready to face this problem or not, Reichen knows the time has to be now.

“The policy needs to go away now; no more deaths for being gay, no more harassment, no more physical harm, no more humiliation for gay people in the military. We have the right to want to die for our country, to serve our country, to protect our country just as much as anyone else and we need to deal with it. Gays will always want to serve in the military…and we have to deal with it.”

For much more of Reichen’s thoughts on outing celebs, gay marriage, and his future projects, check out Part II of Bobby’s interview in January’s OutTakes section of Pulse!