Throw a Wet ‘n’ Wild Pool Party
By Cherie Ronayne

Got water? Got sexy friends? Want to make the best of the two? Then there’s only one thing to do ~ throw an old-school pool party with some new twists! Here’s how:

INVITE ALL KINDS Mixing up your guest list makes for the best time

INVITES Try this: Inflate a beach ball and write the party details in permanent marker. Deflate and mail or keep inflated and hand-deliver to guests (lots of fun if your peeps work in conservative environments ~ they’ll love having you swing by and toss a beach ball into their cube!)

WEATHER IS KEY (the hotter the better, duh) so keep an eye on a reliable extended forecast and plan accordingly. Have an indoor Plan B in case of rain (you could always put on the swim suits and run around in the rain – or move the wet t-shirt contest outside!)

DECORATE the yard with tiki torches, big pots of flowers, and lots of big beach balls in and around the pool ($3.95/dz at Oriental Trading Co.). If you want to do an Hawaiian theme, put floating flowers in the pool ~ and Cathy at Sprout (June St., Worcester) will make you beautiful leis…and you KNOW you’ll get lots of joke mileage out of those! She suggests palm leaves for tropical decorating, too. (You’ll find all kinds of Hawaiian party goods at iParty ~ Coconut bras for everyone! You’ll have lots of hot material for MyPpace the next day.)

ANOTHER THEME How about an Iguana Do Ya Wanna Party? Start with the most important item, the drinks…in this case a yummy frozen concoction called The Green Iguana.

Mix in a blender:
1/2 part tequila
1 part Midori® melon liqueur
2 parts sweet and sour mix
Add ice, process ‘til smooth. Serve in a margarita glass.

Buy packages of assorted rubber lizards at iParty and go wild putting them in strategic places ~ food trays, drink glasses, peeking out of your bikini top or shorts (you get the idea).

Grab a couple of lizard-like, blow-up pool toys (c’mon, what’s a party without something…or someone!…inflatable, right?!) and you’re almost finished. For the wet Tshirt contest, buy all the chicks cheap, lime green t-shirts (hit Walmart) ~ not dark green, those don’t let you see anything! ~ and proceed with the soaking. Now what about those strategically-placed rubber lizards, you ask? Well that’s an easy question to answer ~ you simply pair up your guests (boy/boy, boy/girl, girl/girl, whatever floats your boat!) and have one person remove the lizards from his/her partner’s suit with…that’s right…his or her teeth! No hands allowed, this is all mouth-to…well, wherever!

And don’t forget the disposable underwater cameras for any impromptu games of “You show me yours, I’ll show you mine…” ~ but be forewarned, if your photos are too graphic, you may get into trouble developing them!

TRY THIS GAME to get things rolling before you move on to the wet Tshirt contest. You’ll be laughing your ass off in no time! Drop 30 golf balls at each end of the pool; divide guests into two teams ~ one for each end of the pool. On “Go,” one person from each team stuffs as many golf balls as possible in 30 seconds into his or her bathing suit (or wherever!). Go through all team members one at a time, totaling after each, and tally at the end. Who DOES have the most balls? Offer prizes ~ how about the used golf balls? Ewwww…!

WET T-SHIRT TWIST Grab a pile of Supersoakers (try Toys R Us or borrow from the neighborhood kids) and blast the girls from a safe distance. (Some of those guns have amazing force so play accordingly ~ tender ta-tas, y’know…) Wet tighty-whities anyone? Equal opportunity wetness for all!

AS ALWAYS, SAFETY AND LAW FIRST! I don’t have to tell you, right, to invite only your friends who are 21+? ‘Cause nothing is more of a party buzzkill then Booze and Swimming are a potentially dangerous mix. Ask the Designated Driver to play lifeguard ~ and of course offer him or her amazing bribes, if necessary. Ultimately, as the host, it’s your responsibility. SOMEONE has to keep an eye on the drunks in the pool! And then there’s always another option, turning the party into an overnighter…!

FOOD Keep it simple so you don’t have to stand at the grill all night (Remember? You have to watch the drunks?) unless you have an incredibly enthusiastic grill-cook-friend, in which case make sure this friend wears an apron over his/her bathing suit…’cause OUCH, grease splatter can be a bee-atch!

Do the usual burgers and weenies, but also throw on some chicken kabobs and veggies. Beware (no matter how delish it is!) grilled corn-on-the-cob…icky, icky corn-stuck-in-teeth syndrome! Put out some bag munchies and you’re pretty much set. But keep the blender going no matter what, y’know what I’m saying??!

NOW DIVE IN AND GET WET!