thePULSEThe Glimpse into What College Life is Really Like
By Timothy Harrington (college senior) with Eleine Fang (entering freshman)
What are some of the best ways to stay awake in order to pull an all-nighter before an exam or an essay deadline?
I suspect your parents want to hear, “Plan ahead! For a paper, do the research weeks in advance, write it with days to spare and turn it in early. For a test, study your notes after each class and attend your Professor’s office hours weekly; that way, cramming simply won’t be necessary. If you do all of these things, you will spend your night-before-due-dates with feet on the futon and smile on the face while your classmates redefine panic one Red Bull at a time.”
But, sorry parents, in my experience, no matter how much you do to avoid the night-before-panic, you often can’t avoid it. So, when the all-nighter presents itself, how can one cope? Unfortunately, there isn’t a one-size-fits-all remedy to the burning eyes and the bobbing head ~ everyone seems to develop his or her own tactics. Coffee, tea, energy drinks, power bars, uber-caffeine pills, exercise, sweet candy, sour candy, dim lights, bright ones, cold rooms, warm ones, wooden chairs, comfy ones ~ most of us settle on a healthy (or, sadly, an unhealthy) combination of several. College is a time for experimentation so, experiment! I assure you, you will have no problem finding any of the items on my list and after a few stressful trials, you will learn what works best for you.
Are the dorm rules strict?
I suspect your parents want to hear, “Yes, the rules are respected and strictly enforced by every tier of the Res-Life Staff.”
I also suspect that you hope to hear, “No, the rules merely exist on paper to help your parents sleep soundly in their newfound empty nest.”
Fortunately for both parties, the reality falls somewhere in between these two unrealistic extremes. While most rules carry significant weight in the college dormitories (i.e. respect for others’ space and property), other rules/laws, especially on the weekends, are routinely overlooked (i.e. “quiet hours” and ~ parents, cover your ears ~ the drinking age). It seems that, in college dorms, there is a Machiavellian ends-based approach to life. At the end of the day, if everyone remains happy, the rules ~ or lack there of ~ are accepted as a functioning system. But, if someone has been wronged, hurt or endangered, the rules must be altered or strengthened accordingly. That said, this theory can be undermined by both overly strict and overly lax Resident Assistants (R.A.s ~ who, by the way, are great people to befriend ASAP if you’re hoping to break the rules and get away with it).
My advice to parents and incoming students who have concerns regarding dorm living is to keep ALL of the doors of communication wide open. If you are a worried parent, talk to your child like an adult and, if they don’t sense punishment or judgment, they will open up. If you are an unhappy resident in a dorm, talk to your Resident Assistant immediately. Again, the rules are in place to keep you happy and comfortable, if they are not doing just that, something will change.
Dating advice for college?
I would be lying if I claimed to be some sort of college dating expert. I’m not, so heed my advice as just another opinion ~ not scripture. I’ve done it, sure, but not particularly well and not in the way that the term “dating” implies. In fact, I think “dating” is a peculiar concept on college campuses these days since “dates” are less and less involved in the process. Between our generation’s new and dangerously available concept of the “random hook-up,” as well as the explosion of Facebook onto the scene, we certainly do it differently than our parents did.
More often than not, a couple is not dating until they have “hooked-up” (often at a party), friend requested and socialized on Facebook and exchanged cell phone numbers. Then, the pair may begin holding hands around campus, drinking smoothies together between meals and accompanying one another to the dining hall a few times a week. The couple may “date” for weeks without actually going on a “date.” This, I suppose, is my first piece of dating advice: don’t expect to be going on many dates. It doesn’t work like it did on Seinfeld ~ not anymore, anyway.
My second piece of dating advice has to do with the “random hook-up” approach to dating. If you are dying to meet a date-able person, do not go blindly and/or recklessly into that dark night. Most times the easy hook-up is not the one that will be expecting the smoothie on a warm autumn afternoon. Rather, you would be better advised to be patient ~ you have 4 years ahead of you to “hook-up” with the right people, and a few lonely nights won’t ruin the whole experience (whereas a few “random hook-up” nights could). In addition to patience, if you hate people that go to frat parties, don’t go to the frat house lookin’ for love. Pick the right party for you. Pick the right person for you (what a novel concept!).
Lastly, while Facebook is a great tool to get in touch and keep in touch, it is not a way to develop a deeper understanding of a person. If you have never met the person you are suddenly enthralled with, sitting behind a computer screen will never help your chances. If you have met a special person, sure, use Facebook to familiarize yourself with his/her hobbies and friends ~ but don’t rely on it to strengthen your relationship. Shut it off and leave your room-find that someone and ~ I don’t know ~ get a smoothie or something…go on a date.
What’s it like having a roommate?
Interesting question.
For me ~ and I’m sure many of you ~ having a random roommate selected for me was the singlemost nerve-racking aspect of going away to college. Having carefully picked the school, the clothes, the TV, the DVDs, the shoes, the flip-flops, the posters, the pictures, the lap-top, the deodorant, the cologne, the shampoo, the soap, the ‘fridge, the rug, and even the stereotype (in my case, x-athlete-bro-hippie) I’d use as my persona, I felt like the roommate situation was the only remaining question mark in the air (and, in my mind, it was a BIG question mark). Who was this guy? Would he cramp my style? Would he steal my girls? Would he scare my girls? Is he expecting a two-year commitment? And I hope we don’t have matching deodorants…
But, now, looking back ~ having survived roommatedom myself as well as having seen friends and family do it, too ~ I can honestly say it’s not that big adeal. Here’s why…
First of all, it’s not out of the question that you and your roommate will meet and immediately hit it off and never part again. That was Easy (I just pushed the button).
Second of all ~ like snakes and spiders, your roommate is as scared of you as you are of him/her. He doesn’t know what to expect. She, too, fears that you’ll be catty and mean. You’re both in the same unsteady, insecure boat.
Third of all, it isn’t a two, three or four year commitment. You are living together for one year, if you so choose: and you probably will since, unfortunately, your freshman year roommate usually isn’t your lifetime bff.
Thirdly, freshman year is a whirlwind and, assuming you aren’t b.f.f.ers, you’ll end up on entirely separate schedules (both social and academic) and never see him/her.
Fourth, and most importantly, if you don’t hit it off right away, stick with it. Sometimes, it just takes that mid-October episode of drunken pillow talk to make the two of you see eye to eye. It did the trick for me, and we’re still good friends.
And lastly (and probably a non-issue, but it’s good to keep in mind anyway), if you find yourself in a dangerous situation, there is always a way out. Talk to your parents, R.A.s and other friends ~in other words, use proper channels to fix things if your gut tells you that this guy/girl sharing your room is serious bad new.
So, I’m all out of advice, now. Go figure it out yourself… you’ll be fine.
And just for fun…
What are some of the best late night coffee shops, restaurants, etc. open near or around Worcester campuses?
The Corner Grille-Flatbread pizza. For 21+, BYOB.
Tortilla Sam’s-Mexican food. For 21+, BYOB.
George’s Pizza-Delivery. 3 words: Buffalo Chicken Calzone.
Pizzeria Delight-Delivery. Bagel Sandwiches (cheeseburger bagel).
Brew City-Sports bar. Cheap wings during Football Season.
The Boulevard Diner-24/7 Diner.
Wings Over Worcester-Delivery. Chicken Wings.
