By Suzy Gears

You can’t get in my head it’s already overcrowded.

Poetry. For me, it’s a touchy art form. Some goes right over my head, and that’s fine, I get that (I am certainly nooo expert on the subject but Shel Silverstein rocks, right?!), and some, I truly enjoy and even manage to absorb.

Enter Worcester’s resident modern poet, John Dervishian. A thirty-something (you can figure out his age by Googling ~ John graduated Cambridge Rindge and Latin School with none other than Matt Damon) with a penchant for penning some poignant and very relatable verses.

The following piece reflects upon his “past” life ~ a time filled with some bad decisions fueled by substance abuse and a constant ache for a loving, attention-filled home.

A Child’s Words

“He’s just a little prick!”
that’s just my aunt,

she’s drunk
the smell of liquor fills the air
along with the blinding fog
“I would rather argue with myself than come
to uncertain terms with my lethargic mother.”
I’m leaving now. DO not follow me
I will roll dice to earn my life.

“I had issues with drugs BUT I do not want to be classified as someone that was a drug or alcohol abuser. For me it was more or less college experimentation. Everyone is going to experiment in some form, in college. I was doing what I was doing because of the pain I had inside of me. And yes, that IS what started me writing ~ that’s what brought it out for me…,” explains Dervishian.

Reflection

I just got high to escape the misery
that I am feeling
It’s just a dream, a fantasy
Life is passing by while my eyes are closed
I am overlooking what’s good and living my life
in the future, when there isn’t one
if I continue this way
I need to wake up and see myself in the mirror
Get a good look at what I have become

Dervishian has evolved into a writer, a caretaker to his two girls (ages six and two and a half), and a husband with a knack at corralling deep thoughts into small, carefree, compact poems.

The piece below was inspired by an unfortunate, eye opening event: during a night of partying, John witnessed his best friend’s leap from average 18 year old to inmate
because of an unspeakable murder that landed him in jail for nineteen years (John’s friend is now out and has a great job and serves his community’s at risk children).

Bar Scene

An illuminated smoke filled room
with fabricated conversation
as the liquor begins to the supervise the night
Words, tarnishing the image of morality
Bodies vibrating from one to the next
agitating potential prey
Flawless outlines are falsified to conjure up a bedfellow
An illuminated smoke filled room

Check out John Dervishian at: www.purification.yolasite.com. Also, check out his poetry readings live ~ and sometimes backed by a blues band:www.poetrycove.yolasite.com
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