A Headstrong Look at Tip-Top Fashion
By Sasha Fastovskiy

“A hat on the head keeps a child out of bed,” or so the saying goes. We all remember childhood hats ~ the sweaty scalps, the restricted views, the damn way they tied at the neck.  What a horror it was, being yay-high, being pushed and pummeled into our wool and fur headgear by over protective parents, grouchy teachers, or “Don’t drink too fast, you’ll catch a cold!”-grandparents. Most of us even remember losing our hats, being elated for a week over loss of said hat, and then pouting away the rest of the winter when our caring parents replaced aforementioned hat with …new [itchier, tighter, uglier] hat. Even after we took our hat destiny in our own hands, many of us would banish hats for several years; the memories were far too painful (and itchier, tighter, uglier) to jump back in headfirst. However, perusing the expanded headwear section at the malls made me completely rethink my childhood hat aversion. Perhaps, instead of aiming to make me uncomfortable, my hat putter-onners were just getting me ready for the head trend. What if, instead of making sure I didn’t catch pneumonia, they were instilling in me the fine art of hattery? Could it be that the only way I could pick out my brown, feathered fedora today was by understanding the dreadfulness that was wearing a white, fluffy, pom-pom tied….thing. I will choose to believe so, and that realization has helped open my eyes to the huge hat fad that we absolutely should let go straight to our heads this winter.

The runways are making heads spin with all of the hair-raising accessories, and hats are probably the most wearable, most unisex, and most versatile of them all. Literally made for everybody, they come in all different colors and patterns, so selecting one to match a coat or outfit is a cinch.  However, it is growing increasingly trendy to select a hat that doesn’t match the outfit completely. Going in the completely opposite style is now…the style; if the outfit is loud and flashy, the headwear should be slightly more casual. To make the cap the cherry on top, try for a bold color or some plumage ~ definite attention getters.

Turbans and head-wraps are slightly more daring, but can also be unique and D.I.Y. Cable-knits, beanies, and casual berets are all head-hugging and totally toasty, and childhood is calling (it’s annoying, isn’t it?) for you to buy a hat with ear flaps or chin ties. For a more high-end look, Dr. Zhivago and other Cossack-like hats are perfect fur cocoons, while youth trends are more focused on visor-style knits and newsboy hats. Hands down (heads down?), classic hats are the biggest inspiration: fedoras, derbies, panama, pork-pie, and trilbies, all in classic patterns like tweed, plaid, denim, and corduroy.

When selecting the perfect hat, keep in mind the look you’d like to achieve. Known for their simplicity, a hat can easily hide a bad hair day or highlight a sports team (let’s stay away from those “funny” hats with the “funny” messages, as well as cowboy hats for winter and trucker hats for…life). For a more polished, tailored look, stick with a hat that offers clean lines and highlights the face. As an added accessory, hats can be slightly more interesting ~ pillbox, veiled, or plush. As for those over the age of eight who’d like to wear hats for the practical sense of keeping warm…please let the rest of us know how that goes.

Before buying that bitchin’ bonnet, make sure it’s flattering. Familiarizing yourself with your face shape and its basic “dos and don’ts” should be top priority, unless your best friend is shopping with you, in which case you can just get mad at her for telling you that you slightly resemble Gilligan. Round and square faces should look for hats with asymmetrical lines, high brims, or angular shapes, avoiding round or circular hats that are wider than the face. Oval shapes are lucky ~ mostly any shape can work for them; it’s only a matter of experimentation. Longer faces should avoid narrow brims (they’ll only make your face longer), instead opting for floppier ones. Color is also important, since a hat is worn almost on the face; it shouldn’t wash you out. Body shape is a factor, to (who knew?); petites can go smaller with hats, while curvy ladies can find balance in wider hats.

As the weather gets colder and more coats are worn (covering up fabulous outfits ~ a travesty!), many find that the biggest remaining form of fashionable self-expression is hat. Therefore, be bold with berets, take a flying leap with fedoras, and go nuts with newsboy caps. Just don’t drink too fast, you’ll catch a cold that way.